Holding me together
by Emily Shakespeare
Summary: Edward and Bella were best friends until Bella is forced to leave at 13. When she comes back will they still be friends? Or something more? Canon Pairings.
1. Young love!

**Hi! This is my first all all human story, so please be gentle. All of the pairings are canon, except for the ex's. Enjoy! Oh yeah and REVIEW!!**

**oh and bella and edward are 8! I would start the story now, but I'm already working on another one. I don't own twilight.**

BPOV

I sat figeting in my desk trying to tellipathically get the teacher to start class, but she was to busy making googoo eyes at Mr. Thompson. UGH!!

"Bella? Are you listening?" That EVIL boy asked.

"Oh sorry Mike!" I said apologetically.

"Oh, no, it's fine but then as I was saying, do you like dora the explorer? I just watched the halloween specail last night and I LOVED it!" He gushed.

"Hmmm...isn't that a girls show?" I asked trying not to look too disgusted.

"Yeah but I thought that if I watched more girls shows then we could watch them together...in the dark" Oops! too late!

"Mike I think class is about to start, you should go sit down" I said cooly.

"Okay I'll sit with you!" He said eagerly.

"Oh I'm sorry mike!" I said with fake regret.

"I got in trouble and I'm supposed to sit by myself today" I lied quickly.

"Oh maaaaaaannnnnnn!!" He groaned.

"Is this seat taken?" A velvet voice asked behind me.

I turned around to see a beautiful boy with shiny bronze hair and breath taking emerald eyes. He smiled at me shyly. I loved it, it was crooked and full of perfect white

teeth.

"Well, actually-" Mike said glaring at him until I quickly interupted.

"Nope, actually I was starting to get a bit lonely!"

I grabbed his arm and yanked him down into the chair beside me. He looked confused but pleased.Mike's eyes narrowed angrilly as he realized that he'd been tricked.

"Heeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...wait a minute!" He said in a whiney voice.

"Mr. Newton! Would you do us all a favor and go to your seat!" The teacher says sternly. I smiled at him sweetly, and he glared back.

"Now class I want you to turn to the person next to you and ask them twenty questions about themselves, becuase they will be your buddy in everything from feild trips, to

projects up until your junior year of high school!" I stared at her in amazment. Wow and to think that could have been mike!

I turned around to see my new partner staring at me happily, a blushed.

"I guess we should start," I mumbled.

He chuckled quietly.

"Alright, what is your name?" He asked curiosly.

"Isabella Marie Swan, but you can call me Bella, yours?" I tried very hard to sound offhand.

"Edward Anthony Cullen, but you can call me Edward. Do you have any siblings?"

"Yeah I have an older brother Emmett, he's in the fourth grade but he could pass for a sixth grader. And I have an older brother named Ryan, he's in the fith grade, you?" I

said nonchalantly. (Yes he's not in twilight but you'll find out his purpose later!)

"I have a twin sister named Alice, she's over there."

He pointed to a short pixie like girl with spicky black hair and really right blue eyes. She saw him pointing, smiled, and waved at us before turning back to the tall honey

blond boy she was sitting next to.

"She doesn't look like you." I stated curiously.

"Fraturnal" He said simply.

"Oh" I mumbled blushing at my stupidity.

"Your parents?" He asked quietly.

"My dad is the police cheif, I live with him, and my mom died a year ago." I said sadly, forcing back the memories.

"I'm sorry, I shouldnt've asked" I stared at him in shock, he wasn't asking how it happened, just staring at me in concern.

"It's okay you didn't know"

"What are your hobbies?"

"I play the piano"

"So do I!" I gasped.

"Really?" He said eagerly.

We spent the rest of our time discussing things like this, he was the only kid I have ever met who knows Chopin. Mike _says_ he does but I highly doubt it. Until we got to

the last question.

"Bella?" He asked looking at me curiosly.

"Yeah?" I asked confused.

"Are we friends?" He said sounding slightly unsure.

"If you want us to be" I said nervously.

He smiled his soft warm smile at me and wove his hand through mine. My heart beat sped up erratically.

"I think I do"

**Hope you liked it! PLEASE REVEIW!!But please do not flame even though I like critism and suggestions!! The more you reveiw the faster I'll update!!**


	2. Whatever Alice

**Hi guys! Well here is my new chapter and I really hope you like it!**

Nine Years old

BPOV

I rubbed my eyes as I walked into our tiny kitchen to find Emmett flipping pancakes on our dingy little stove, and Ryan sitting

at the table reading. I noticed that the gunbelt wasn't on the peg and looked at the clock. 6:30 and Charlie had already left

for work, no suprises there. I stumbled into the kitchen clumsily.

"Those better be chocolate chip" I said groggily stumbling into a chair.

''Hey bells" Emmett said turning away from the stove, scooping me into his world famous bear hugs. I tried to tell him that I

couldn't breath, but all that came out was a tiny squeak.

"Emmett, you might want to put her down before she suffocates" Ryan said good naturedly, running a hand through his

chesnut hair. Emmett scowled at him but put me down, turning back to the stove so he could set a plate of golden brown

pancakes on the table.We all dug in, not even bothering to use table manners. I would NEVER say this to anyone, but Ryan

was more of a parent than Charlie or Rennee.

Ever since Rennee died Charlie barried himself in is work, he even forgot my birthday. It just made things worse, like he had

died to. Ever since Ryan woke everyone up, helped with homework, if I wanted to go somewhere, he got me there. Emmett

would cook, and I would clean and do the laundry.

"So Bells..." Emmett said looking up from his plate, wagging his eyebrows evilly.

"Whens your boyfriend going to pick you up?" I glared at him and he stared innocently back.Edward and Alice and I walk to

school together everyday.

"Well he should be here any moment but it just all depends on how fast he can get the kids to school" I said in a fake

maternal voice. He and Ryan both snickered.

Now me and my brothers all have the swan family hair, mahoganyish kind of a little red, but our eyes were different. Ryan had

grey eyes that made it impossible to lie if you were staring right into them, Emmett had hazel eyes that would make it

impossible for you to be mad at him. And then there's me, I have brown eyes, and even when I'm trying my hardest to lie. Or

at least thats what Edward says.

Ever since Edward moved here last year we've been best friends, he told me everything, and I vise-versa. His sister Alice and

I are best friends to. They always say you can't have two but there is no rule that says it. Just then I heard a knock at my

door. A small smile came onto my face as I ran over to open it. And there stood Edward his Emerald eyes shining, and Alice

bouncing as usual.

"Your wearing the outfit I picked out!" She squealed happily, running her eyes over my cargo pants and blue t-shirt **(it looks **

**reaally adorable!) **I sighed and held out my hand. She rolled her eyes and pulled a twenty out of the pocket of her skirt.

Normally I never would've agreed to that but if you saw the outfit you would agree that I totally earned it.

"Hi Bella" Edward said casually as we walked out the door.

"Don't you love birds mind us!" Emmett called from behind us. I blushed but Edward didn't seem embarrested at all he just

smiled his crooked smile at me.

"Yes go live your lives why'll your still young!" Ryan snickered. I turned and arched an eyebrow at him he just shrugged, his

grey eyes shining. I rolled my eyes and continued out the door.

"Guess what?" Alice said excitely her electric blue eyes buzzing with excitment. As we walked down the pavment a couple of

leaves rushed by in the wind as the sun went behind a cloud, casting shadows across the ground with only little puddles of

light scattered across the pavement. I tried to walk on them with out touching the shadows.

"Hmm?" I asked not really paying attention.

"Edward got kissed!" Edwards face matched his hair as he glared at Alice angrilly. I froze a few feet ahead of them, my arms

held aloft like a ballerina's.

"Lauren lept on me and I don't even think I'm old enough to like girls yet" He said coldly to her. I frowned, Lauren is the

meanest girl in my school. She and Jessica have started a little gang of girls whose soul purpose was to make my life

miserable. For obvious reasons I didn't like the idea of her kissing him.

"Amen" I muttered.

"Ryan and Morgan kiss alot but that's different, they are in love. Plus they're like, sixth graders so they're old enough to get

married or something" I stated. Morgan is really nice, pretty and smart. Most people thought that she and Ryan were to

young to like each other like that but they both are really mature for their age.

"So, how does that even work? You know being in love?" Edward frowned thoughtfully and shrugged.

"Well the guy has to think the girl is pretty" He said as though it were obvious.

"You are such a pig!" Alice said before adding

"You have to think the other person is funny, or you would get bored of them"

"Well," I said calmly

"It doesn't sound fun, Edward doesn't love me and he's the only guy besides Emmett and Ryan who can make me laugh." This

made Edward look very uncomfortable.

"I do..._Love you_...your my best friend" He said. I laughed and kissed him on the cheek.

"I love you to Edward" I said patting his shoulder, Alice sighed happily.

"Ah, young love" We both rolled our eyes in unison.

"Sure Alice" Then I frowned as I remembered something, finally it hit me.

"Oh no! I forgot!" I gasped.

**Hi guys! Sorry if it's short! Reveiws motivate me to update! Also, edward and bella won't reunite in forks, so i have a list **

**of cities.**

**New York**

**Boston**

**Whashington D.C.**

**L.A.**

**San Fransisco**

**Pheonix**

**Charlotte**

**Atlanta**

**New Orleans(no hurricanes though)**

**Chicago**

**Philadelphia**

**Seattle**

**Sacramento**

**Miami**

**Palm Springs**

**K well i'll update as soon as possible...REVEIW!!**


	3. IMPORTANT

Hey guys, I can't update right now but I'm giving you the next best thing

Hey guys, I can't update right now but I'm giving you the next best thing. My friend Lily Alice Potter has a story called Harry and Lily potter and the sorcerer's stone, read it, it's sooooooooo good. You will not be dispointed, but don't worry! I'll update as soon as my parents give me internet.


	4. Phone Call

Hey guys! So sorry it took me so long, but I am back now a here to stay. I really need you to review so that can pick out a place or I might get evil and do something unspeakable! Don't own twilight!

BPOV

"Oh no, I forgot!" Edward and Alice stopped and stared at me cautiously.

"What is it?" Alice asked frantically.

"Did we have home work or something?! I cannot afford a bad grade! UGH!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!" Her usually pale face was red and twisted with fury.

"It's my mom's birthday" I mumbled sadly. Edward threw Alice an annoyed look and walked over to wrap an arm around my waist, I leaned against him closing my eyes. When I opened them Alice looked completely mortified. I tried to smile at her, but it came out as more of a grimace.

"You go ahead to school," I said smoothly. Alice looked between Edward and me, sighed but continued to walk. Edward remained firmly in place. I raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

"You don't have to come you know" I said quietly, I knew I was gonna cry, I mean who wouldn't? But I didn't want Edward to think that I was some dramatic case, just some weak girly girl. Edward frowned but shook his head.

"No, I want to stay with you" I nodded and kept walking until we got to the cemetery. Not a old creepy one like what you see in horror movies, but a quiet, peaceful one. I was walking slowly, but firmly to the very center. I could barely here Edward's soft footsteps behind me, we kept walking through the grass until I got to a giant Willow tree, and sat down on the grass. There was a small pond in the shade of the tree, I looked in and saw a young girl with bright brown eyes, and lustrous mahogany hair that fell to her shoulders. And a boy, with a perfect pale hand on her shoulder, he had bronze hair that fell around his eyes, his beautiful green eyes, that seemed to smolder, even in the dim light. I frowned and looked away, I looked like her. Edward sat down next to me in the grass, I turned to see him staring at me like I was made out of glass.(sorry for the rhyme)

I turned and looked at the small polished stone in between us I reached down and let my fingers skim over it lightly, probing the cold surface.

Renee Swan

1975-----1999

May she find peace with God

I looked up at Edward to see his eyes where mine had just been, he was very good at trying to hide his emotions, but his eyes widened slightly, giving him away. I resisted the urge to mutter "Gotcha", but it didn't seem like a good time to use sarcasm. He finally looked up at me with sad eyes and hugged me tight.

"I am so sorry Bella" I felt my throat close up and choked out.

"It's okay" Edward began to slowly stroke my hair, I sighed. He wasn't gonna leave, and he definitely didn't think I was a basket case….he didn't care about the drama… he cared about me. I felt a single tear go down my cheek.

"He drinks!" I blurted out. I clamped a hand over my mouth, but it was to late. Edward pulled away, for some reason I felt disappointed, but I immediately shrugged it off.

"What?!" He asked sharply. I sighed, there was no point in lying, he would know.

"Charlie, but I mean he doesn't hit us or anything!" I said quickly. Edward put his hands on either side of my face so that I couldn't look away.

"How much Bella?" He said. I tried to look like I didn't know what he meant, but the look on his face made me decide against it.

"He gets drunk a lot," I said quietly. "And he is addicted, but he usually just falls asleep on the couch." I looked up through my eyelashes to see Edward looking at me sadly.

"You have to tell child protective services Bella" He said softly. My eyes filled up with tears. Everyone thought that kids in a bad home environment were stupid for not telling anyone. But they never knew, they never understood. I had a life here, friends, and I loved Charlie.

"I can't" I whispered. Edward frowned but opened his mouth, but I held up a hand to stop him.

"Thanks Edward, but I'm not in danger. If it ever gets to that point I'll call." I muttered. Edward didn't say anything, we just sat there in silence for a while, until I finally stood.

"Let's go" I said quietly. Edward just looked at me with his sad eyes, stood and walked behind me without a word. The walk back to my house was long and tense. By the time we got there school was already half way over, so I saw no point in going. I stopped in front of the door and turned to Edward, who was staring at me cautiously.

"He's at work" I explained softly, he nodded and left with out a word. I sighed and stepped into the house. And nearly puked at what I saw.

Beer bottles were scattered across the floor, and Charlie was on the couch, his face was covered with drool and it was easy to tell that he was drunk. He was staring at the TV but his eyes were out of focus. He turned and saw me, his eyes filled up with tears. He reached and hand out towards me. My heart began to beat fast, and all I wanted to do was get away and go to sleep. I wanted my mom.

"Renee" He whispered. "You came back" I felt my eyes fill up with tears, the first time he looked at me in a year. I reminded him of my mother. I closed my eyes and took a step back.

"It's me Charlie," I whispered through the tears. "Just go to sleep, I'll be here when you wake up". He beamed at me.

"You're right baby, I really am tired" He mumbled as he nodded off. I backed out to the door, sobbing silently. He wasn't ever going to get over it. And I was tired of watching. I sat down on the porch and pulled out my cell phone. It was better for him this way, it really was. I dialed the number and hung up three times before finally calling.

"Hello, this CPS, how can we help you?" A women's voice said warmly. I closed my eyes, I had heard this women so many times, thought of so many things to say. But all I said was,

"Help me"


	5. Rescue

Previous chapter…

"Help me"

BPOV

There was a long pause on the end of the line.

"Where are you sweetie?" She asked. I sighed at the sound of her voice, it sounded so…maternal.

"My house" I said my voice still rough with tears.

"Where do you live sweetie?" I quietly told her my address, I could hear her jotting it down.

"What's the problem?" Tears started flowing down my face.

"Please come," I whispered. "Before Daddy wakes up, he's drunk and my brothers aren't home" I heard the women stop breathing.

"I'll call the the Chief-"

"He is the Chief" There was a long pause again, my breathing speed up. What if she didn't believe me? It was my word against Charlie's, a respected member of the community.

"I'll come right now sweetie, what's your name?" She asked.

"Isabella Swan, call me Bella"

"Who are your brothers?"

"Emmett and Ryan" I heard the quiet purr of a car starting.

"Where are they?"

"School" There was shouting on the other end of the line.

"Someone's going to pick them up, walk as far away from your house as you can but stay on your street" I obeyed with out a word. I sat on the curb and talked to her for I don't know how long, we talked about friends, family, TV

shows. She had a son my age named Jasper. Her name was Esme Cullen, and She was married to her soul mate, Carlisle.

She lived in D.C. because Carlisle was the Surgeon General (Causing me, to beg for an autograph). We had been talking for forty five minutes when I saw a Mercedes pull on to the street, it parked just by the old stop sign. It was so

strange, so out of place. Like some one had pasted it out of Vogue and right into my crap hole of a neighborhood. I ran to it as fast as I could and climbed in. I turned to see a beautiful woman with caramel colored hair that glittered

in the sun, with grey eyes that looked a lot like Ryan's, that were full of worry that twisted her features. But even then she looked like snow white in blue jeans and a coke t-shirt.

"Please tell me your Esme" I squeaked. She laughed and said,

"Yeah I am, where do your brothers go to school? We should probably pick them up. I quietly told her the name of my school and watched as Emmett and Ryan walked to the car.

"I am so sorry!" I sobbed. "He called me Renee, he's been doing that a lot lately. This time he was drunk, but he isn't always" The sobs were racking my body, it felt like I couldn't breathe. Emmett just stroked my hair sadly.

"I w-w-want my m-mommy" I whispered tearfully burying my head in his chest.

"I know"

But of course what I didn't know was, Esme was going to adopt us and take us to D.C.

She was going to take me away from Forks, and everyone in it.

**Hi guy's! Sorry it took so long, but I've been swamped with school, I'm actually supposed to be writing an essay right now….. oh well! And I have almost picked out the place where they reunite… how does private school in NYC sound? Reviews are my air, DON'T LET ME DIE!!! Sorry..hemhem….spaz attack….don't own twilight…for now…**


	6. Light on

Hey guys! New chapter! Sorry these have been so short, but they're all kind of flashbacks so you can know what is going on when we get to present. This chapter is going to be a little longer though… and the next one… and if I don't get twelve more reviews I will kill off a character!!!! DUHDUHDUHDUUUUUH!!!!!!!!!!!!! ***dirge playing in background*** PAINFULLY!!! Kay I'm done now, see even my authors notes are getting longer!!!! Kay now I am seriously done…. Don't own twilight… ***Twilight characters*** WE BELONG TO STEPHENIE MEYER! *Me* YOU WILL DO AS I COMMAND!!!! *Them* NEVER!!! ***I sigh*** Fine…

BPOV

When we finally got home school had been over for hours, and there were fifteen messages on the machine, one from Edward, one from the school saying I had an unexcused absence, and thirteen from Alice.

The one Edward left was "Uh… Bella? Crap this is the machine, isn't it? Well, Alice and I were coming to pick you up, you know, for the movies? Well nobodies here…" His voice lowered and he said softly "Is it that problem we talked about earlier? Alice is freaking out, call me back as soon as you can. Bye." It was at the end of that message that Charlie stumbled into the room roaring

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN!!! THE SCHOOL JUST CALLED AND YOU ARE DEAD!!!" I shrunk back into the couch, this was when Esme stood eyes blazing.

"That is quite enough Mr. Swan" Charlie froze in place.

"Bella who is this?" He asked in a deadly voice. Tears welled up in my eyes. I loved my dad, I still remember his booming laugh, and his crinkly eyed smiles. But those times were gone, he wasn't ever going to laugh or smile again, the Charlie who had been my father was dead. And I was dealing with what he had left behind.

"I'm sorry daddy" I whispered my voice shook slightly. "You're an alcoholic. You need help." My voice was slowly gaining force "Renee died a year ago and she's not coming back, I'm tired Charlie. I'm tired of dealing your crap. Look at me. Look at me!" Charlie slowly lifted his head to stare at me. My eyes narrowed and I glared at him. "The first time you've looked at me in a year when you haven't been drunk. PATHETIC. What about me Charlie? Your little girl? Or Emmett or Ryan?! I'm leaving Charlie, Esme's taking me in. She'll be twice the parent that you are! She'll look at me, love me, tuck me in, TALK to me, remember my birthday, and she wouldn't cheat on her wife and then act like it's the end of the world when something happens to her!" I spat screaming out the last words at him through the tears. Charlie's eyes widened with anger. He lumbered toward me, his eyes like a wounded animal's.

"You little brat!" He hissed slapping his hand across my face so hard I fell to the ground.

"MR. SWAN!" Esme shouted. Two police officers stood behind her. I knew both of them, Zach and Jeb.

"Hey Charlie" Jeb said softly as Zach crept up behind my dad. Charlie's eyes clouded with confusion. Jeb was one of Charlie's oldest friends who had the strangest resemblances to Morgan freeman. (If you don't know who I'm talking about LOOK IT UP) I trusted him, he was a good man with a family. He was nice to everyone he met, and he was a good man.

"Jeb, what's going on?" He stared at him sadly.

"Your under arrest Charlie" I felt like the world was spinning, sure I'd wanted Charlie away from me, but jail? Charlie looked like he had been punched in the stomach.

"On what charges?" He choked out. A cop to the end.

"Fraud, child neglect, and mental abuse" I was still on the floor. Just watching.

They took him to the very prison he had been the chief of, it made me sad, bitter, and oddly satisfied. I didn't cry a single tear as they dragged him out the door.

I remembered all the nights I had wished Charlie was like Jeb, someone who just helped others because it made them feel as good as they were.

But Chief Swan was not a good man. Though for a long time nobody knew it, he never was

_____________________________

The car slowly pulled up to his house, pulling the coat that they had given me tightly around my shoulders. This was not something that I had been looking forward to as I usually did. I went up the first two steps, then another and just sorta sat there for a while before knocking on the door. I waited my heart beating so loud that it hurt as I listened to the faint footsteps coming towards the door. It opened to reveal the cold Elizabeth Mason, she had never liked me or my brothers because we did not acquire enough wealth in her eyes to be considered anything more than common street urchins.

"Hello Mrs. Mason" I greeted her quietly. She gave me a slight nod and said

"Hello Isabella, coming to see my children I presume?" I felt like I was in one of those old movies where everyone talked like they were from the Victorian age.

"Yes Ma'am" I said just as coolly as she did. I stared into her green eyes. How could she be so much like Edward, yet so different? Irritation flicked across her features

"Well are you coming in or not?" She said. I blushed and hurried in.

"Sorry" Bipolar. I walked through their living room that had its usual resemblance to a pottery barn catalog. I hurried upstairs. (Extra loud, just to get in Mrs. Mason's nerves) And stumbled into Alice's room. Alice was at the foot of the bed, filing her nails while Edward was sprawled out, reading. They looked like a Grecian painting of the gods in pajamas.

"Hey" I mumbled. Edward's eyes flashed up to mine and I held his gaze. My hands curled around the two letters in my pocket. Crumpling them slightly. I sighed, trying to relieve the pressure I felt on my chest. I looked at Edward and mumbled "I need to talk to Alice. Alone." Edward stood up, looking slightly hurt, and walked away talking about he could not even read without getting kicked out of his room without being kicked out by a bunch of girls. Alice closed the door behind him.

"What's wrong?" She asked quietly in a strange Unalice-like way. I ran forward and hugged her as hard as I could. Pushing back my tears.

"You were right" I whispered. "You have been the best friend in the world and I don't deserve you, and I will never find a friend like you again. You're my best friend and always will be. And you were right" I Whispered again, pressing the letter into her hand.

"I can't have two" And with that I walked to Edward's room.

____________________________________

Edward's eyes once again rushed up to meet mine. And for that moment time stopped. It was like someone had flicked a light switch as I stared in to those eyes, those perfect eyes. His perfect face, and his perfect everything. In that moment felt so many things sadness, anger, disappointment, and a crushing happiness. His eyes widened as though the same thing was going through his head.

"I love you" I said. I didn't whisper or scream dramatically. I just stated the fact.

And with that I leaned forward and brushed my lips against his. It felt as though someone had sent an electric shock through my body, all to soon I pulled away. But another part of my mind was going through different scenarios. Going into full make out mode, or tracing the angel bones of his face, then laying my head against his chest. Enough my brain told me _you've had your fun Bella, but from now on keep your hands to yourself._ I sighed and smiled sadly.

"Tell everyone that was your first kiss" My fingertips grazed his cheek for a moment as I looked into his eyes again, and tried to picture what our future would've been. All that surfaced was _Anne of Green Gables_ daydreams. After that I dealt another blow to my heart. Hardening it around the edges and sending a crack down the middle.

I turned around and walked away.

_____________________________________________________________

Alice sat in her room staring at the two letters Bella had pressed into her hand. She tore open the one with her name on it.

_Dear Alice,_

_By the time your reading this I'm probably on a plane to D.C. Charlie's crazy, he has been since my mom died, I called CPS and I've been adopted by Carlisle and Esme Cullen, they're amazing people and they'll make me happy. I have only one regret, and that is to leave you and Edward behind. You are my best friend, that will never change, I have told you things that I will never tell anyone else. I'll send you my new address as soon as I find out. In the other envelope there is a letter for Edward. Give it to him when he's ready._

_P.S. I wish I thank you enough, but I can't. So I'm just going to ask you to do something else. Find the joy in your life. And if I can ever come back, leave the light on to guide me home._

_Your best friend forever,_

_Isabella Marie Swan_

She sat there for she didn't know how long and cried. Just as she new her friend was crying for her, and their pain molded into one living mass of grief for the friendship they had lost.

"Alice?" She heard Edward's voice whisper at the door. She hurriedly wiped her nose and eyes shoving the envelopes into her bedside table.

"Come in" She said trying to sound normal. Edward stared at her like she was a lunatic.

"Uh…where's Bella?" Her heart ached to tell him.

"I think she went home to make up homework or something" Edward nodded and headed down stairs. She hadn't been strong enough to tell him. Neither of them was ready.

_______________________________________

Never really said to much

Afraid it wouldn't be enough

Tried to keep my spirits up

When there's no point in grieving

Doesn't matter anyway

Words could never make me stay

Words will never

Take my place

When you know I'm leaving

Try to leave a light on when I'm gone

Something I rely on to get home

One I can feel

Night

A naked light, a

Fire to keep me

Warm

Try to leave a light on while I'm

Gone

Even in the daylight

Shine on

And when it's late at night

You can look inside

You won't feel so alone

Hey the next chapter will be on everything that happens until they move to N.Y.C. And you should be so proud of me this is my longest chapter yet! Kay well remember my warning from before… Twelve reviews! Until the next read….

-Emily-


	7. Ice

**Hi guys, you all should be very proud of me! Last chapter got more reviews than ever and you now obviously know what motivates me more than anything. REVEIWS. They give me confidence and a better mood so that I don't do anything like kill off a main character. This chapter is pretty much everything that happens to Bella after she leaves forks. Since she is getting older I am going to put some rough language, but nothing that they haven't put in a pirates of the Caribbean. Which roughly means that I will rarely say damn or hell. I don't like swearing but it adds character to it in the way I'm doing it. Not like a teenager trying to be cool. In a review from Klutzrus she asked me how old Bella is. Bella is thirteen, so is Edward and Alice. Emmett is fourteen and Ryan is seventeen. Also Bella gave Edward and Alice both letters, Alice's is in the chapter but she doesn't give Edward his. We might never find out the contents of the letter….or will we? Who knows! I don't even know because I haven't decided yet! Moving on to the extremely annoying disclaimer…. DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT. IT BELONGS TO STEPHENIE MEYER. ALL LEGAL RIGHTS GO TO HER. I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT AND NEVER WILL. Ah well. That was humiliating… now that we understand each other I can actually start typing this chapter….**

Fourteen (BPOV)

After we left Forks and settled down things went relatively back to normal, Emmett took up football and Ryan graduated high school. He started college and met Caroline, who became his steady girlfriend. She was a sweet kind girl, with golden blond hair and grey eyes, just like his. She came over for every holiday (She doesn't have any family, so we kind of adopted her) and went on every family vacation. A month ago they announced that they were engaged and that Caroline was pregnant with a baby girl. Carlisle and Esme are the world's best parents. They were gentle and kind, but firm with Emmett. He and their biological son, Jasper, became best friends. Jasper is a honey blond boy with blond hair and blue eyes and became my brother, and best guy friend. And soon girls at school were trying to use me to get to his heart, I usually gave them bad information for Jasper's sake. He had really helped me when I first came to D.C. he helped me learn to smile again, just the way Emmett helped me laugh again. Mom and Dad helped me love again, because I soon came to adore them, and their patience and kindness.

"Bella!" My dad's voice interrupted my thoughts. "We need you in the living room!" I jumped off my bed and ran down the smooth staircase. I zipped into the living room to see everyone sitting with grave looks on their faces, a look I was all to familiar with. Mom had ducked her head into dad's shoulder, her caramel curls quivering. The comfy armchair in front of me looked suddenly forbidding, I gulped and sat down.

"What's going on?" I asked cautiously. Ryan cleared his throat loudly, he and Caroline were sitting on the love seat, her sparkling grey eyes had gone dark. I saw the suitcase by the door, my stomach dropped.

"Bella, sweetie when I turned eighteen I legally became an adult in the eyes of the world" He spoke in his soft firm voice. My brow furrowed in confusion. What's going on? "And in the eyes of the U.S. army" Oh god. Oh no. Not now! Not him! I shut down all of my raging emotions. My face remained smooth, waiting for him to continue. "I registered for the the U.S. army, because I want to serve my country. I hope you respect that. I have been called to Iraq for a two-year service. I am a young, educated man, and they need me in the air force. I'm leaving in the morning. I love you and I hope you can understand" My heart had stopped. Everything did. I felt the ice around the edges of my heart creep in deeper cutting off my breath. My body moved in robotic, wooden movements, like I was watching myself from a distance.

"You're afraid of heights" I said icily. I turned and walked to the porch hearing his soft footsteps behind me. I finally let my fear surface. I gripped the rail so hard that my fingers ached; my teeth came together with an audible snap. I felt Ryan's soft warm hand on my back. My whole body yearned to turn around and hug him, but I stayed in place. I heard him sigh quietly, but I still didn't move.

"Bella, I don't want to leave but I don't have a choice! What do you expect me to do?! Tell them 'oh! I'm sorry I changed my mind'!" His anger fueled my own. I needed him! His family needed him! His child needed him! And he was going to take himself away out of some misplaced sense of public duty?! I turned around and leaned against the rail, staring him down.

"Esme is inside crying her eyes out" I said coldly. He flinched away from my gaze and stared at his shoes. "Caroline is being strong for you, because of how much she cares about you. And your going to leave her and your baby without a second thought" He peered at me through his lashes with anguished eyes, I saw in them my reflection. I didn't see the happy girl I had been, her eyes were cold and unforgiving, they widened slightly, and fear flashed across them before going back to normal. "Just do what you want Ryan" I snapped walking past him.

"You always do"

I ran up to my room, throwing myself onto the pillows. Only one tear went down my cheek.

When I woke up in the morning he was gone.

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Fifteen (BPOV)

My little niece Renee Isabella swan was born that year on September 17, 2007. She was an adorable girl, with my hair and eyes like her father. I rarely ever spoke about Ryan anymore, and I made a point of not thinking about him. Of course every now and then I would try to imagine what he was doing, or if he was thinking about me. I had some how become popular. How you might ask? All the guys wanted to date me and I had a lot of friends. I began to just try to get out of the house whenever possible, it was to painful to look into his empty room knowing he might never see it again… three days after she was born we sent a picture of Renee to Ryan.

U.S. ARMY HOSPITAL SEPTEBER 27 2007

Ryan sat on his bed staring at his daughter feeling more than he thought he ever could. Joy, love, sadness, guilt, but no regret. They had shot him out of the sky; several chunks of steel impaled him. He was bleeding to death on the inside; there was nothing they could do. He would be dead in hours. Tears welled up in his eyes as he thought about the daughter he would never see, and the sister who hated him. He stood by his decision, he fought to make a better life for his family. He asked the nurse for a pen as he pulled a box from his nightstand drawer. Inside were postcards he had been saving since he got there. He began to fill them out for specific dates to be sent.

Deer Renee,

Sorry I missed you first words, steps, and birthday.

To my baby girl,

Love, Daddy

Dear Renee,

Sorry that I couldn't take you to your first day of school

To my baby girl,

Love, Daddy

Dear Renee,

I wish I could've told you to stay away from boys. Happy thirteenth!

To my baby girl,

Love, Daddy

Dear Renee,

Sorry I couldn't put the fear of god into your first boyfriend.

To my baby girl,

Love, Daddy

Dear Renee,

I wish I could've walked you down the isle

To the my baby girl,

Love, Daddy

Dear Renee,

There is nothing I would've liked to do more than hold my grandchild.

To the joy in my life,

Love, Daddy

He leaned back against his pillow with a sigh, feeling a wave of pain over take him. He took out one last slightly crumpled piece of stationary and began writing hurriedly.

Dear Bella,

If your reading this I'm gone, I'm sorry for leaving like I did, but I though it was best. You always seem so sad Bella, and I think I know why. I have only one wish and that is you find the joy in your life. I've found mine.

Love, Ryan

P.S. I'll tell mom that he's sorry.

When he finished he collapsed onto the pillow and spent a long moment staring at the picture of his daughter. He was going to miss her whole life, every precious moment. Caroline would eventually move on and find someone else, but that was ok. She deserved to. It was meant to be this way, him dieing. He was the sort of person who you remembered, but not until after he was gone. His family would remember him, try to be like him, and think of him in times of sadness to lift them up. He would be gone but not forgotten. He smiled at the thought. He looked at the picture one more time, his vision was clouded. He felt like he had been riding through a storm that just cleared.

He closed his eyes and let the waters take him.

BPOV

Emmett and I were in the living room having a stare down. He kept winning because he made funny faces. I laughed when he made a fish face.

"No fair!" I spluttered clutching my side. He grinned.

"No you just are an easy laugher!" The doorbell rang. I laughed as I got up.

"You are such a goof!" I choked out heading towards the door. When I opened it my smile vanished. It was a marine officer, looking all high and mighty in his uniform. He regarded my expression coldly. For a moment I felt kind of bad for him. Nobody wanted to see him at their door. He handed me an envelope and walked away without a word. Nope. All compassion gone.

I ripped it open to see a letter for my parents. And one for me. I recognized the messy scrawl across the front. The one for mom and dad was from the navy. Mine was from my brother. I knew before I opened it what had happened. My brother was dead.

I didn't cry a single tear. I just felt a crushing pain in my chest. My last words to him had been an insult. That was the last time he heard my voice. My horrible, despicable, voice. This sent the ice all the way to my core, it just froze me. I remembered that girl who had been there the last time had seen him. The mean Bella who said things just to hurt people. I hated her.

"Bella?" I turned and saw my mom in the doorway; I just ran to her and hugged her as tight as I could. Pressing my face against her red sweater. I waited for the pain to become slightly bearable. I looked up at her face and handed her the letter without a word. I wanted to cry, to melt the ice, but I couldn't. One tear, and I would shatter. I turned and ran up the steps, only to run straight into jasper.

He looked at me, his big blue eyes filled with concern.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I stared into those eyes, trying to find any comfort that could relieve the pain in my chest. But relief never came. His eyes were not the ones I needed.

They weren't green

Sixteen BPOV

Jasper and Emmett started a band. It was an alternative rock band that soon became popular at all of the dances and parties. I sometimes wrote songs for them. But there was never a piano part. I hadn't touched the piano since my brother died. I didn't even try to think about him anymore. Alice and I emailed constantly. But I hadn't heard a word from Edward, not one. He had become a distant memory, my first kiss.

Ever since I left Forks a started trying to get kissed like that again. Some were good, some bad. But none were like my first. Where the lightest touch sunk straight down to my toes, and filled me up. I tried to tell myself that that is what your first kiss is like, but I knew the truth.

Seventeen (BPOV)

I stared out the window of the plane as I saw the New York skyline come into view. I yawned and drummed my fingers against the window. Dad was going to be chief of surgery at New York Memorial Hospital. The biggest on the east coast, probably the country. I was going to be enrolled in a fancy private school for rich kids. I continued to smile at the skyline. I should smile right? This is what I wanted. To get out of D.C., out of that house. I took a piece of my hair and twisted it between my fingers. It had grown out, I looked a lot different than I used to. My teeth had straightened out, my skin had cleared, and well my chest… had turned out quite nicely in the eyes of the male population. And in other words, in the minds of guys a had become the girl everyone tried to get. Fun.

"Hello passengers this is your captain speaking, we are preparing to land" My fingertips skimmed the windows surface.

Welcome Home

Hi I know, I know I killed Ryan. But that was always the plan, he was based of Ryan Skidmore, he was the bravest man I ever knew, may he rest in peace. Now when I said that I would kill a major character, I meant an original twilight character. And for future notice, most of the time when I put an extra character in it's just to kill them off to make the main character sad and depressed. Now we are up to present and the Edward and Bella fluff will commence in five… four… three… two… one…

-Emily-


	8. Muffin war

**Ello! I know I know, the last chapter had no Edward and you are all miffed about it but he is back, inexplicably hot, and adorably **

**sarcastic! I love my seventeen-year-old version of Edward! Now, just in case some of you are wondering what the heck the song **

**was in chapter six, which was light on by David Cook. I did mention Jasper and Emmett started a band, and all of the songs I post **

**are songs that they play. I would like to say that, I do not own any of the songs that I will put in later chapters. This chapter is **

**where I really get into the whole drama thing. Ooooh you thought that I had already started making you bite your nails? Well **

**news flash I haven't, I have actually been pretty lazy with past chapters. Now it's getting**

**interesting. DON'T OWN TWILIGHT**.

BPOV

"Bells?" I heard Jasper call from the backseat. We were at a stoplight so I turned in my seat.

"What?" I asked him impatiently. I was slightly annoyed because I hadn't wanted to drive my brothers home, but Mom and Dad were going to

the hospital to set up his office, so I had no choice.

"We have a gig in a teen club called 'The Cave' next Saturday and we need a set list" I frowned, this was their job, but of course I would get stuck

with it.

"Uh… track three through fourteen on the bonus album" I said effortlessly. It was easy really, they were the most popular songs and this was a

premier concert.

"Oh and we need flyers so we can get a new guitarist" Emmett added. "So… Mrs. Computer wiz? Your time has come." I rolled my eyes.

"Is there anything that you do without me?"

"Go to the bathroom?" Emmett said jovially. I frowned trying to imagine it.

"That's just disgusting" I snapped wrinkling my nose in disgust turning a corner a little to sharply.

"Bella" Jasper snorted. "If you crash then you won't be able to punch Emmett for that statement" That got me to slow down. A little. We finally

pulled up in front of the old, Victorian era, mansion. Mom and Dad lived here and so did we, on weekends. During the school week we were going

to live in our penthouse in Manhattan so we wouldn't all have to cram together for us to be able to go to school. That was pretty much how we

spent our day, moving boxes into the penthouse. Until I started laying out my outfit for the next day. A pair of low rise jeans with a dark blue

cami and a denim jacket. It was enough to count as stylish, I was honestly hoping not to attract to much attention, I had no interest in making

friends.

"EMMETT!" I yelled yanking the covers off his bed. What did he think he was doing?! He woke up in a splutter of limbs. Finally sitting up and

running a hand through his hair.

"Wha? Who?" Then as the grogginess kicked in, "Why!" He groaned flopping back onto the bed. I climbed onto the bed and started giving him

tiny slaps. Trying to wake him up.

"Emmett! It's 6:45 you're in your boxers and I still haven't woken up Jasper!"

"Present" I heard him groan from the doorway. I looked over and nodded seeing that he had at least started getting dressed, his hair was smooth

and he had a pair of jeans on.

"Jasper go put on a shirt and Emmett get up! You have the Metro card and I am not going to be late on my first day!" Jasper nodded and walked

towards his room while Emmett rolled out of bed and started picking clothes off the floor and pulling them on. I ran to the kitchen and grabbed

two muffins and three coffees. They finally came walking into the kitchen looking like they had been up for hours. I rolled my eyes. Girls at school

would always say that they were effortless perfection, and ask me how they did it. I wanted to tell them 'because I do everything including

literally tying their shoes' but no, I just shrugged it off and changed the subject. I tossed them their muffin and handed them their coffees,

grabbing my own as I pulled my purse over my shoulder and ran out the door.

It was really surprising that they only realized something as we climbed onto the subway. When Emmett stared at me like I was crazy.

"Umm… Bells? You only gave us ONE muffin and there is TWO of us" I smiled and took a bite out of my own muffin.

"Yeah, I guess I have to share!" I said cheerfully. Pulling my cell phone out of my pocket. Emmett looked horrified.

"But why do you get your own?! We're both big guys! And you're tiny! How much could you possibly need?!" He squawked. The look on his face

was hilarious. I grinned.

"Well, get up early enough tomorrow to make your own breakfast, and since Jasper is the one holding it, you'll just have to fight him for it!" I said

smiling at them cheerfully; then the war began. They really helped me start my day, having Ultimate fighter three in the subway over a

cinnamon muffin, crumbs flying everywhere, and even the most seasoned New Yorkers staring. Priceless.

After a longtime, we finally got to the front doors of Liberty Grace High School. Or LGHS. A big stone building that is pretty much meant to

intimidate. It actually had a gate that you used your ID card to get in to. A gate. I am sorry but really a gate?! Once we got in Emmett wouldn't

shut up about football and tried to convince Jasper to try out for Running back, but Jasper said he was trying out for soccer. I rolled my eyes and

said I was going to class. Until I felt myself run into something big and warm. I was about to fall on my but when someone gripping the tops of

my arms, holding me up.

"Are you alright?" I heard a velvety voice ask breathlessly, though it sounded to my ears like a seductive purr. I was about to tell him I was fine

when I looked at his eyes, the emerald eyes that I had not seen in so long staring back at me.

**Hi sorry, this was short, but I wanted to leave it with a cliff hanger. But I will update sooner! Now, do you want Carlisle and Esme **

**to adopt Renee or should she live with her mom? It's really up to you because I can't decide… Anyway! My goal is to have more **

**than a hundred reviews by chapter ten! Do not let me down!**

**Emily**


	9. The grabbing of the Noses

**Hola! Yes we actually saw some Edward! I know and now we see him all over the chapter and we swoon! Also, I just wanted to tell you if anyone has any advice on the story it would **

**be REALLY welcome! This the first story that I've really gotten into. I'm thinking about two new ones after this… once we get towards the end I'll give you the choice of which one to **

**do first… Anyway you do know that I don't twilight right? All right good now I will begin to type!**

EPOV (I'm trying! If you don't like it tell me!)

I stared down at her face in awe, it was the most beautiful thing that I had ever seen. Perfect, pale ivory, skin that showed features reminded me of those Grecian paintings of half naked goddesses dancing

to lute music. I was quite ashamed to admit that I was very disappointed about the fact that she was fully clothed. It showed her perfect curves, she wasn't a toothpick, but she wasn't too big either, with a

perfect hour glass figure, a long neck, wide hips, but not un-normally wide, and a very, very, very nice chest. She also had the most perfect red lips, that were very kissable. My eyes moved to her hair, it

hung around her face and stopped just above her elbows and glittered with red in the sunlight. I finally moved closer and closer to her eyes first looking at her perfectly arched eyebrows, then at her

eyelashes, so thick and dark then finally into her captivating chocolate brown eyes, so deep and expressive that I felt like I felt like I was falling into them. Bella Swan, the one girl that I had ever kissed, well I

guess I had kissed other girls, but they were boring, trying to shove their tongues down my throat, when I kissed those lips I felt like I could kiss them forever.

"Are you alright?" I breathed, my hands tightening. She lifted her head completely to look at me her own hands became limp against my chest. As she stared back at me I was certain about who she was.

Bella Swan, the girl who had left without saying goodbye.

BPOV

I looked up at him; he had the most perfect features, from which I could not look away. His bronze hair had grown out; it hung in front of his eyes now. He had grown tall, and very well muscled, so beautiful

that it hurt to look at him, but his beautiful eyes, green fire, already hypnotized me. I stared at him for a long moment before hesitantly asking, trying to prove that my mind hadn't created him out of

loneliness. Out of longing that I could only begin to recognize.

"Edward?" I whispered. His eyes (even though I had thought it an impossibility) brightened.

"Bella?" He said, slightly louder than I had. So either I had gone completely bonkers, or things had actually gotten better, drastically. Being bonkers seemed more likely at the moment. But I would fantasize

just a little bit more, before I wake up and dispel the most perfect dream, the one that I had always wanted. I smiled at him.

"What are you doing here?!" I exclaimed.

"I go here"

"Your joking" Nope. I've cracked. He stared at me like I was crazy.

"I mean, I go here too!" I said feeling to feel a rush of warmth in my cheeks, the shock of it only made me blush harder. He stared down at me and then showed me that one part of him was still the same,

by smiling that adorable crooked smile the way he used to. I smiled back at him, I liked the way it felt so effortless, so easy.

"Well I should- um- get to class" I said embarrassed as I slipped out of his arms, I looked around the courtyard to see a bunch of girls in cheer uniforms waving at me giggling and smiling. I smiled and waved

but took the first chance to turn back to Edward to see him frowning dismally; I then realized that several of the girls were smiling at him, not me. Oh god, some things really do never change. I smiled at

him happily as his eyes widened with confusion.

"Well, looks like you need to go catch up with your fan club. Sit with me and me Emmett and Jasper at lunch, if Alice is here she's welcome to come too" I said smiling at him. He looked hurt.

"You're not going to help me?" He said looking like I had just drowned his puppy or something. I giggled.

"Did you ever help me with Mike?" I said smiling at him. "I love paybacks" I muttered under my breath as I started walking towards my first period classroom when I heard him chuckle.

"Yeah, so do I" I started to turn to ask what the heck he was talking about before I felt a hand on my hip. I looked up. Speak of the devil.

"MIKE?" I gasped. Great. And I was staring to like it here. He had grown up all right, I guess. But there was something in the way that he looked at me that made me feel like something to eat. He frowned,

obviously he didn't remember me. But he smiled anyway.

"What's cooking good looking?" He whispered thickly, just like the counts in the romance novels. Unlike the seduced characters in the books, I snorted.

"Other than the worst pick up line that I have ever heard?" I snorted loudly shoving past him, hearing the laughs of his buddies.

"Oh The M-Dog loves a challenge!" Oh great! This will be wonderful! He calls himself M-dog! And he thinks I like him! I pretty much stomped to first period.

First was Social Studies which I was honestly looking forward to, it was an interesting class. The school is a paperless system, all notes are on laptops, and projects go on flash drives, which is perfect, I am

built for a paperless system. I have horrible handwriting, and I either lose or crumple every piece of paper put in my hands. But I am however, excellent with computers, I type so fast that sometimes my

fingers are a blur. I can't lose files that I've saved, and I can do everything at the same time on my Mac. My beloved computer, affectionately called Mac or Macky, or by Emmett MACdonald. I opened it and

started emailing Alice to tell her the news, better yet I thought to myself, I'll call her. I pulled out my cell phone we had recently gotten a new phone plan so I had a blackberry storm. I realized before I hit

speed dial that I still thought that I was dreaming slyly making sure no one was looking a pinched my arm. Hard. OW! Nope not dreaming. I nodded and hit speed dial one. Next to me a phone rang.

Alice it's Bella, pick up your phone! I'm waiting! You still haven't picked up? What the- "Hey Bells!" The person next to me said cheerfully. I turned and grabbed that person's nose. It was how Alice and me

used to greet each other. They automatically grabbed my nose out of reflex. I then found myself looking at my best friend. Who had every right to hate me.

Hi hope you liked it, and I wasn't joking earlier about the whole advice thing, I don't have a beta reader and I am trying to rewrite one of the greatest love stories ever written, and I can't do it alone. This

isn't just my story, if someone gives me advice then I use it. I believe that the readers should always get a say in the story. So the reviews are encouraging and I know this sounds weird but I NEED criticism!

It's how I learn. Also I know this is short but that's the way my stories are, lots of short chapters. But I'm planning on having thirty-five to forty chapters. But I am trying to update fast so cut me some slack

please! Also that stuff in italics was Alice's ringtone. By the way I just finished Pride and Prejudice and loved it! You can tell so many authors got a lot of inspiration there! I think I might base a story off of it…

what do you think? It would be after I finish this one of course… what have you read lately? PM or review on it.

Emily


	10. AN IMPORTANT

**Hi, I know, I haven't updated and I'm really sorry! My dad blocked Fanfiction from the computer! So we have made a bet, if fifty people review for my freedom, then he'll put it back on, this is really important! I'm dieing here! Well, it's just really uncomfortable…. Help me! You're my only hope!**


	11. Edward say what?

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**Bonjour! Hi guys, I know, I know, SHE DIDN"T UPDATE! OFF WITH HER HEAD! But geez, I have been VERY busy with school, plus the **

**last chapter did not get as many reviews as I wanted so this is what happens. And by saying "Busy with school" I mean my English **

**teacher recommended me for a higher-level class and my whole schedule changed. Which over all sucked because now all my friends **

**are in different classes. Plus the guy that sits behind me is making my life living heck, he's arrogant, he thinks that just because he's in **

**advanced placement that makes him the best thing that ever happened to third period!!! And I got a lunch detention because I tried to **

**hurt him! He deserved it! He kicked my seat for the upteenmillionth time and I lightly hit him over the head with a hard cover **

**encyclopedia!!! Okay, sorry, just venting, anyway... seeing as this is the only thing you guys will respond to, (I'm sorry but I REALLY **

**want reviews!) if this chapter does not get thirty reviews I will not update for a month, if it gets seventy five then I will release the title **

**and a sneak peak at the sequel. How's that for motivation? On with the chapter!**

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APOV

I gasped as I stared back at my best friend, she always says she has two but I know she's in love with Edward so the other part doesn't matter. She

was like a sister to me, a part of who I was. And she still is... I don't know, she just never really seemed happy when we talked on the phone and visited

me. She was just... gone. So I was pretty darn shocked to be holding her nose in the middle of my social studies classroom.

"Bella?!" I gasped. Yes I know, I should've reacted faster, leave me alone okay! Her eyes widened to. And thus the happy dance begun. After about

five minutes of giggling and screaming my stream of questions began. She answered them all sullenly, and avoided a few. I felt pent up frustration flow

through me. But there was something about her, it could've been the look on her face, or the way her shoulders were hunched like she was expecting a

rebuff, or just the way she looked at me, that made me push the feelings back.

"So....." I said.

"So?"

Before I could answer her, class began. I took the opportunity to gather my thoughts as the teacher began to lecture us about Political history I was

bored out of my mind thinking about the shopping trip I would HAVE to take her on after school...

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EPOV

I walked into Math in a daze, I had just seen her, Bella, SHE kissed me, then disappeared. And now she meets me again, brushes it off like it was

nothing, and I"M the one whose freaking out?! I hate my life... after Bella left everything went wrong. For one thing, Mom and Dad got a divorce, mainly

because Dad found Mom in his best friend's lap kissing him... well basically like she was trying to give his tonsils a good wash... that made everything

change for all of us. It all started with dad moving out and mom using the word 'so' a lot. Like 'SO I guess my opinion doesn't matter?' and 'SO your

father is your favorite now that you see me as a tramp' or 'SO I guess this means that you don't like Rick?' Oh right I didn't tell you. Well Rick is mom's

second husband, who wears shiny button down shirts, gold jewelry, smokes cigars, the whole shebang. Actually I think he might work for the mafia. Dad

has never gotten remarried, and as I lost respect for mom I gained respect for him. He came out of his early retirement and went back to medicine. He

was now the chief of surgery at the best hospital on the east coast. Mercy West. Dad also felt guilty about all of the years he had wasted, going along

with mom. He started donating money to charity, he started recycling, bought a hybrid car, basically made the whole family go green, he adopted my

sister Rosalie and in the past three years since he and my mom divorced, he has never been with a woman. So after all of this (which I knew Alice told

Bella about) she never tried to call me, or comfort me? That does not sound like the Bella I knew? I'm beginning to think the Bella I knew is gone forever

and replaced. And if so who is the new Bella? And where did the old one go? I always remembered, that last touch, after years of ache having to grow up

next to the person you love. You cry with her, you laugh with her, and your entire lives seem to twist and bend until they each revolve around the other

until you didn't ever think about life without that person, nothing could exist without them. But you can never tell that very person that secret, the only

thing that you kept to yourself. The only part of you that you hadn't given was what I wanted Isabella Swan to have more than anything. That I am

completely and irrevocably in love with her.

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** Hi guys! I'm back! Thank you to all of those who voted for my freedom! I would be nowhere without you all! i'm sorry this chapter **

**was so short, but I threw this together in an hour to reward you guys for saving me! Oh and in case you haven't guessed, last minute**

**change: Carlisle is Edward's dad and Esme is Bella's adoptive mother. (Sarcastically) I wonder what will happen? Anyway, I am trying **

**to be better about updating and am already working on the next chapter. P.S. Look up Ella Marie Mason, she's one of the best authors on **

**this site and has alot of great stories up! laughed, I cried, reflected on humanity, then started looking at a frog... wait where was I? Oh **

**right! Ella M. M., look her up, you won't be disappointed. PPS. Do you like my little border? It took forever... my sister made fun of me**

**but I know you guys love it! Lie if you don't. So yeah you know the deal so let's go down the list, don't own twilight... check... **

**REVIEW!!!... check... and RAWR!... check... so that's it, bye! PPPS. Did you know that you're supposed to capitalize the G in God when **

**you write it down? (NOTICE THAT I CAPITALIZED THE G! I know some fangirls would've corrected me on that... you know who you **

**are...) I mean I know that it is used as a name but I thought that the grammar of writing it down would be the same as any other **

**word... weird... oh and i also have something VERY important to tell you- OH MY WALMART! A PICCOLO! GOTTA GO!**

**-Emily-**

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	12. Two goth kids and a world of pain

Heeeeeeeeeeeeey guys! Nothing much to say this time except well... some reviews would be nice, as always, and I do not own twilight.

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BPOV

I stared straight ahead at the chalkboard, trying so hard not to meet Alice's eyes, avoiding the questions that were probably running threw her head, like_ How are things? _or _Whats been happening to _

_you? _or _ How are you're brothers?_. But when the last question came, it was the only one that ripped away another piece of me. In a way that I never expected. Alice turned to me and asked one of the

simplest questions that anyone had ever asked me.

"Are you Ok?" I forced a smile at her.

"Yeah, I gotta go to the bathroom" A hurt look crossed her face before she nodded. I stood up and rushed out of the room, grabbing a hall pass. I hadn't lied to her about one thing. I really did have

every intention of going to the bathroom. Until I looked over to see a freshman pinned against the lockers by two Goth chicks. I leaned back against the wall and watched.

"Look I gave you the book report, just let me go!" The small blonde squealed as she struggled against them weakly, she didn't even push them off an inch. Oh wow. It was a little hard to watch. I took

a step closer... to get a better look. The taller one snorted. Now these kids really annoyed me. Most of them grew up with pretty comfortable lives, nothing bad happened, but nothing good either. So they

thought that they got to go around being sorry for themselves and act like life sucks and they got the short end of the stick.

"Now if there is one thing I don't like, it's whiners"

...

"And I don't like bullies" Before either of them could do anything the short one got her head banged against a locker and the other had her arm twisted behind her back by yours truly. I felt the anger

flowing through me, making me so angry that my whole body felt like it was burning in every molecule. I know what your wondering, when did weak clumsy little Bella get a back bone? Three words. D.C.

public school system. I'm still no expert, but I can still kick two Goth kids butts.

"What are you doing freak?!" The tall one screamed at me. Huh. I'm really not sure.

"Just go back to class before I slam YOU against a locker" My voice was so calm and emotionless that even I was scared. " And if I ever see either of you doing something like that again then it will be

much worse. Got it?" She nodded vigorously. Yep. Just a spoiled private school kid who was used to being the scariest girl on the block.

I let her go and her friend stood up groggily; she was going to have a major headache. I knew what it was like to be on the receiving end of a head butt, and it is not fun. The two of them went running

back to class with their tails between their legs. When I turned back around I gasped. The girl was sitting on the floor with a huge bruise coming up on her cheekbone. But that wasn't what shocked me. At

first look I had assumed that this girl was a freshmen, but now I saw her perfect mature features, she had to be at least a junior, and she wasn't as small as I'd first anticipated, but there was a look on her

face that made her seem so. Like she was so tired that she just wanted to go to sleep, and sleep until all of the problems went away.

But this wasn't what surprised me either. I recognized her from emails Alice had sent me. It was her adopted sister Rosalie.

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** Heeeeey! Sorry for being gone so long but this is what I do when you don't review... I get mad... so... yeah... heheh...sorry? And I know you must be confused when you don't see **

**the strong, independent Rosalie, but most girl in her position are actually quite vulnerable. And since when does Bella ever stand up for herself? If you have any other questions don't **

**be afraid to PM me or I don't know... maybe... just maybe... YOU COULD GET OFF YOU LAZY BUTTS AND REVIEW?! Keeping it real folks!**

**-Emily-**


	13. Poor Tanya

**Heeeeeeeello guys! I'm trying to update a liiiiiiiiiiiiiitle faster so I'm posting this! I know you're all shocked about last chapter. An insecure Rosalie! Shocking I know! Don't own Twilight!**

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RPOV

I looked up at the girl who had just saved me. She was pretty, strong, and had just beaten the crap out of those two girls who were beating me up. I felt horrible about the jealousy a felt towards her. She

was everything I wasn't. She knelt in front of me looking worried.

"Are you alright?" She said holding out a hand to help me up. I took it and stood up shakily.

"Y-Yeah, I'm fine, thanks for helping me!" I squeaked. She smiled good-naturedly sending another pang of jealousy into me. But I couldn't help but smile back.

"What's your name?" I asked her curiously. She shrugged.

"Isabella Hale, but please call me Bella" I gasped.

"What is it?" She said, a look of concern coming over her face. I pointed at her.

"Y-Your that girl who Edward has a picture of in his room!" I said. I recognized her now. She looked flattered and shocked.

"He has a picture of me?!" She squeaked. I nodded.

"You know him?" Her face went blank.

"Yeah... but it was a long time ago..." She said quietly. I smiled and giggled.

"It couldn't have been that long ago, you're in high school!" She laughed and smiled.

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

"I'm Rosalie!"

"I know" I frowned.

"Alice told me"

"Ah" I was about to ask her how she knew Alice when the bell rang. I shrugged it off and asked.

"What's your second period class?"

"Mrs. Shealy's trig" I smiled.

"Me too!" She looked dumbfounded. I frowned.

"What?"

"Your not a senior?" I snorted.

"Heck no!" She shrugged and we walked to class together. Thankfully we had the rest of our morning classes together. Which was nice. We actually turned out to have a lot in common; we liked the same

music, style of clothes, TV. Shows, even the same kinds of foods!

"I can't believe you're adopted too!" I said smiling. She smiled back.

"Yeah, Esme adopted me and Emmett four years ago" I frowned. It was about time for lunch and we were in the bathroom while she cleaned up a cut I had on my arm from the fight earlier.

"But... Alice said you had two brothers" A wave of pain crossed her face for a moment. A look that I knew all to well. I knew then that we were way more alike then anyone else would guess. She had lost

someone. And she felt guilty about it. I reached over and put a hand on her shoulder.

"When did it happen?" I asked quietly. When I looked down I saw that her hand was clenched into a fist.

"Two years ago" She whispered. I bit my lip and forced back my own memories.

"I'm so sorry" She looked over at me her eyes grateful for some reason.

"Don't be, we should get going" I nodded and we stood and walked out of the bathroom. My throat tightened as I watched her walk out. Most of you are probably thinking that I am selfish for being

jealous of her. Which I am a very selfish person, but not for those reasons. I'm jealous of her because if I had been more like her two years ago, if I hadn't been so weak, then a lot of things would've

never happened.

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BPOV

Rose and I walked into the cafeteria laughing at a joke she had just told. She was just as nice as Alice had said, and funny. I had only known her for three hours and she was already one of the best

friends I've ever had. And.... in the bathroom when she asked about Ryan... she understood... which is what I needed. I looked up to see Alice waving at me where she sat with Edward, Emmett, and

Jasper. I looked over to see that Rosalie's eyes widened when she looked at Emmett and I mentally winced. Emmett didn't do relationships. He just wasn't the type of guy to commit. And who could really

blame him? The two men in his life were Charlie and Ryan. Charlie had cheated and Renee, and we all know what happened to him. And Ryan went off to Iraq and left a pregnant Caroline behind. He had

never seen a grown man commit to a relationship. And when I looked over, his eyes were popping out of his head when he looked at Rosalie. Well this is just great, heartbreak in the making. We got to

the table and took the two available seats, putting me next to Edward and her next to Emmett. Great.

"Hi guys." I said nonchalantly. Alice clapped her hands.

"I can't believe we're all here together, it's so weird" I shrugged.

"May be fate decided to play a practical joke?" She rolled her eyes.

"So, I see you've met Rosalie" I nodded and Rose smiled.

"Alice, your friend is a total life-saver! Literally!" I snorted into my soda while Alice frowned.

"Pinky and Mona again?" Now I was choking on my soda.

"Pinky and Mona?!" Rose smiled.

"They are... different..." Alice looked totally confused.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what happened?" She asked. Rose shrugged.

"Bella went Kung Fu panda on their butts" Alice and Edward gasped.

"That's impossible" Alice said while Edward nodded.

"We are talking about Isabella Swan?" Rose nodded.

"Bella- who- got- beat- up- by- a- kindergartner- when- she- was- in -the sixth –grade-swan?!"

"Well, she said her last name was Hale, and she never mentioned any kindergartners, but she is the girl who you and Edward have pictures of!" Edward was frowning, and I was beginning to get worried

when I heard a voice behind me saying.

"Eddie, why would you have a picture of that tramp in your room?" Edward sighed. Now it wasn't what she said about me that upset me, no, I can slap her across the face for that later. It was her

familiarity with him that killed me. The way she put her hand on his shoulder. Was she his girlfriend? Right now I felt like a scared little kid.

"Nice to see you too Tanya, I'm great, and that life threatening surgery that I got went wonderfully" He said sarcastically as he shoved off her hand. I let out a tiny breath of relief; Edward would NEVER

have treated his girlfriend like that. A smirk came over my face. So this was a fan girl. A annoying one.

"Why would Edward have a picture of you in his room?"

"Probably because he has known her forever" Rose said quietly.

"Be quiet you idiot!" Tanya snapped. O.k. now I'm mad. I had my back turned but I could hear her turn to face me.

"Are you retarded? Answer me?" When I didn't answer she flicked me on the back of the head. I sighed and turned around. She was tall, tan, broke about four dress codes and was kind of pretty. Her eyes

widened when she looked at me. My smirk grew when her eyes widened. I knew what she was thinking; I looked twice as good as she did with half of the effort. I could do nothing; just let her talk, but then

she would do it again, and again, and again. Which would be annoying. I had to end this now.

"Why are you so touchy? Does he not have one of you?" My smirk grew into a grin when she flinched. I was perfectly calm on the outside. This girl was so easy to read, all of her insecurities and fears laid

out in front of me. I felt bad about what I was about to say, it was cruel, but as you guys can already guess, I'm not a good person. Right. Wrong. I have no idea what those words mean.

"Hm. Guess not. Well, for one thing, watch who your calling idiot and retarded when you're coming to school half dressed just to get guys to notice you, which isn't going to seem very smart when someone

takes advantage of you" Those words definitely scared her, her flinch was practically a convulsion. "I guess that is one reason that he has a picture of me and not you seeing as I don't need to do that, now I

could go on for days giving you reasons, but my lunch is getting cold, so could you please go away and stop wasting my time?" I said calmly. That was how I had said all of it. Calm and over all cold. I felt a

twinge of guilt when I saw her eyes go wide with horror. I had played on her insecurities and made her feel worthless. Eh. Life stinks, and the sooner she learns that, the better off she'll be. But she soon

recovered, rolled her eyes, called my a rude name under her breath, and walked away.

"What a lovely girl" I said turning around sighing. Everyone looked shocked. This was going to be a long day.

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Hey, shocking I know, cold Bella, nice rose, what is the world coming to?! Review!

-Emily-


	14. AN

Hi guys! I know what your all thinking, where the heck did Emily Shakespeare go?! Well, there have been some major problems in my personal life that I wont go into right now. But the main point of this note is that I'm posting this on every single one of my stories asking the same question: Which one should I continue first? Whichever one gets the most reviews for this post is the one I'll put most of my energy into.

Love you guys!

Emily S.


	15. The Cat Named Steve

BPOV

I watched the others at the table stare at me for a long moment. After that I just stood up

"I've got to go, I need to talk to my English teacher about the quiz on Friday." I lied casually, getting up and leaving. I picked up my lunch tray and purse and headed out the door, dumping my lunch as I went. I winced when I saw Edward following me. What did he want? I turned to face him, the hallway was empty, seeing as everyone was in the cafeteria.

"Yes?" I asked, feigning boredom. He ran a hand through his hair nervously, you could tell from his face he was anxious.

"Bella... are you ok? What you said in there... it wasn't like you at all." I cocked my head to the side

"And how would you know what's like me and what isn't?" My voice was condescending, amused. I inwardly cringed. So I was going to push him away too? The one person who I wanted to see the best in me... I was about to make him hate me. His eyes widened in surprise, and he leaned against the lockers behind him, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Because I know you." He said quietly, staring into my eyes. His... smoldered... with an emotion I can't even describe. I had to look away. I composed myself and snorted.

"Edward you knew me when I was thirteen years old. I'm seventeen now. I went through a little thing called 'Puberty'. I'm not the same." I said, rolling my eyes. He shrugged

"I still know you." I glared, slightly frustrated.

"You don't know _anything _about me." I snarled. He raised an eyebrow.

"I don't?"

"You don't!" I said, my eyes stinging. What the hell was wrong with me? I've only seen him for a few hours and I'm already going crazy! "You don't know what happened after we moved! You don't know how I felt! You want to know why I never wrote to you? Because I knew you wouldn't understand! You don't know half of what was going on in that house before we got out of Forks! You don't know me, you don't know me at all." I was breathing hard by the time I finished my little rant. I waited for him to yell at me, walk away, tell me what a bitch I am. But that jerk just reached out and cupped my cheek. And I didn't pull away.

"I know you make a wish at 11:11. I know your favorite book was Alice in Wonderland. I know that you hate sappy romance novels. That you have the ability to kill any plant you get your hands on. And I know that you, Bella Hale, are scared." He said softly, but firmly. I was shivering. How is it that he can always read me like a book? How can I not see him for four years and still go weak in the knees when he touches me? It's not fair. I backed away, turned, and fled down the hall, knowing he was watching me go.

APOV

I watched my brother and best friend run out of the room sadly. I know something's wrong but... I sighed. They'll have to work it out on their own I guess... I turned to the cute blonde who was supposedly Bella's adopted brother. I smiled at him cheerfully

"Hi! I'm Alice!" He blinked and smiled unsurely; it was so adorable...

"U-uh, hi. I'm Jasper." He said, a little shyly, brushing some hair out of his eyes. His voice had a slight southern twang in it. He was wearing baggy faded jeans and a white cotton t-shirt. It wasn't vogue material but I liked his style. Effortlessly sexy.

"So, which do you like better, French or Chinese?" I asked, reaching forward and tucking some hair behind his ear.

"Um... chinese?" He replied, looking utterly confused.

"Great, then you can take me to P. F. Chang's." I said happily. I was ecstatic. After all, it was my favorite restaurant.

"W-what?" He asked, surprised, looking slightly like a deer in the headlights.

"Your taking me to dinner at P. F. Chang's on Friday night. Here's the addresses of my house and the restaurant." I said, handing the poor guy a slip of paper with the information on it.

"I... I am?"

"Yes."

"Like... a date?"

"Of _course_ Jazz, get with the program, oh and it's a nice restaurant, so you'll need a coat and tie."

"Uh... yes ma'am." He said feebly. I smiled and pecked him on the cheek.

"Good boy!"

JPOV

What... just happened?

RPOV

I was talking to Emmett, and... having fun. I know. I'm shocked too.

"You guys have a band? That's... so cool!" I said breathlessly, then I blushed. Wow. Way to play it cool Rose. He grinned

"You think so?" He asked, excitedly. Kind of like a little kid. A smile slowly spread across my face.

"Yeah... I do." His smile widened. My heart kicked into overdrive. He fished around in his backpack for a minute, pulling out a CD.

"Here, this has got most of our best selling tracks on it, and a few of my favorites. I'll make sure to get you in to our next show." He said happily. I nodded.

"I'd like that." I said, reaching out to take the CD, the edge of the case pulled on my shirtsleeve, tugging it up a little. I hurriedly pulled it back down. Emmett blinked while I put the CD in my purse.

"Hey Rose?"

"Yeah?"

"What happened to your arm?" He asked innocently. I paled slightly

"Oh... uh... I was brushing my cat. I guess I got scratched." I said, pulling my purse over my shoulder.

"You have a cat? I love cats. I mean, I like dogs better, but cats are great! What's his name?" I wanted to smack myself upside the head.

"Uh... uh..." I glanced around the cafeteria for inspiration, the only thing I saw was the guy who sat next to me in History "...Steven." I finished lamely. He blinked

"You named a cat Steven?" I blushed and said defensively

"He looked like a Steven!" He shrugged.

"Ok, ok, can I meet him?" I blinked. I should tell him that my cat is terrible with strangers and will claw his eyes out. But then I realize that my showing him my cat would mean him coming to my house... and the words pop out of my mouth.

"Sure. How does Wednesday sound?"

"Great! I guess I'll see you in English then?"

"Sure, see you there!" I watched him go, and sagged. Great. Now I have to get a cat that looks like a Steven. In two days. I'm screwed.

**Hey guys! I finally updated! You can stone me to death now... don't own Twilight! And there might be some EsmexCarlisle next chapter! What do you guys think?**


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